To the Girl Who's clueless about her life and what to do with it
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To The 20-Something-Year-Old Who Has No Idea What To Do With Her Life

Use this as a guide when you’ve hit a wall

Picture this: Your family dinner’s in full swing. The uncles are downing their whiskies and scotches in their oh-so-manly glory, engaging in a heated debate on politics or sports, while their wives (your aunties) sit around the table sipping wine and gossiping about the “vain” lifestyle of some divorcee. All is well—you’re on your phone or talking to your favourite cousin(s)—until one of those aunties divert the conversation to the young ‘uns and the annual report on every cousin’s (including yours) performance assessment and life aspirations begin. Freaking out, you immediately try, but fail, to steer the conversation in another direction. The focus? Your personal life and career goals. The only problem is you’ve got no frikking clue what you want to do with your life. 


Sounds familiar? This, in a nutshell, is what many of us experience in our late teens to early twenties: not knowing what the end goal was going to be. From being a four-year-old determined to become a princess, to that 20-something-year-old struggling to find out where her passion lies, deciding what you wanted to do in life, simply goes over your head. 


Having no idea where you’re going in life is okay. In fact, most people don’t know either (trust me, it’s all white lies) because plans change continuously, and it’s totally natural. But if you’re trying to figure it out, worrying about where your life is going simply because you can’t fathom society’s constant pressure is the worst thing you can do to yourself. 

These tips should help steer you in the right direction. 

Try everything 

Figuring out what you absolutely love to do also means you have to try everything. Sure, it can be intimidating to try your hand at new careers at first, especially ones you haven’t heard of before, but it’s worth the effort when you find that one passion that’ll make your heart dance with excitement. 

Trial and error is a part of life, so when that aunty tells you, “Putha, it’s time to figure out what you want to do in life and settle down”, remind yourself that you have to achieve things on your time, not hers. 

Do what makes you happy 

Finding your purpose in life also has a lot to do with truly knowing who you are. So, take a break from that 9-to-5 desk job you’ve been complaining about to truly figure out yourself, emotionally and spiritually. This also involves removing people who don’t add positive energy to your life. 

Photo by Eli DeFaria on Unsplash

It’s okay to wait—don’t rush it! 

No matter how much your relatives and friends pressure you to finish that degree, score that job or find a partner, don’t be hasty. All good things take time. So what if your friends are in their third year of college and almost done with their program? You don’t have to follow what they are and certainly not at their pace. Don’t jump the gun— it’s okay to take a gap year to find yourself. Not everyone needs a degree at 25 and it’s important if you love what you do. 

Photo by Filip Mroz on Unsplash

Look into innovative jobs and opportunities 

In this ever-expanding world, the possibilities are limitless. So always be on the lookout for new opportunities and jobs that you haven’t heard of. Who knows? Maybe your passion hasn’t even been discovered yet! 

Another option is to consider starting up your own business. This way, you can create your ideal job, giving you the freedom to call your own shots! 

Photo by BBH Singapore on Unsplash

Clear your headspace by working out/ meditation 

Conflicted minds make very bad decisions! Ask your ex, he’ll tell you! So, make sure your physical health is in check as you embark on this spiritual journey. We all know how much your physical health can affect you mentally, so always remember to exercise and get those endorphins flowing! 

Photo by Daniel Apodaca on Unsplash

Take it easy, don’t let the pressure to find your passion obstruct you from truly finding something that’ll keep! 


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